Reflections of Someone Hanging on to Their 20s

I’ve been fortunate to have had a relatively successful life - by my own measure. My body allows me to run marathons. I can pursue my professional goals without restriction. I get to travel the world, immerse myself in new cultures, serve a living God, and lean on an incredibly supportive community through every season.

As I reflect on my 20-something years of life, I want to share a few lessons. I suspect they might evolve as I gain more experience, but for now, these are the truths I hold close.

1. Find your anchor and stay focused.

For me, that anchor is my faith. There’s space for you if you want to find Jesus too (half joking). If not, find something that grounds you, gives you purpose, and relieves the pressure of believing that every outcome rests solely on your actions. I’m fortunate to have a comforting presence in every season, one that strengthens me through my lowest lows and supports me to reach the highest heights. 

It’s also easy to be distracted by bright lights and shiny objects, but your life doesn’t have to make sense to anyone but you. You’ll receive a lot of advice that sounds good, but clarity comes from knowing which advice aligns with your purpose. Write down your big, hairy, audacious goals - and make decisions that bring you closer to them.

“Yes, my soul, find rest in God; my hope comes from Him.” — Psalms 62:5

2. Build your community and seek wise counsel.

Be intentional about surrounding yourself with people who challenge you to grow. It’s comfortable to stay in circles where everyone agrees with you, but true growth happens in communities that hold you to your highest standards. When making big decisions, I rarely do so alone - I vocalize my goals and seek counsel. I don’t believe in the power of the “evil eye” more than I believe in the power of God. But I do believe in the wisdom of trusted advisors who understand me, love me, and see the blind spots I might miss. Seek counsel from those with experience, integrity, and your best interests at heart.

“The way of fools seems right to them, but the wise listen to advice.” — Proverbs 12:15

3. Do away with fear and don’t take life too seriously.

Too many people live in fear, focused on minimizing losses instead of maximizing gains. This isn’t a critique but a cautionary tale of how easy it is to fall into that rhythm. At one point, I wanted to be a fighting-police-officer-doctor (yes, really). While that dream has faded, my belief that I can curate the life I want has not. I hold onto my childlike curiosity and optimism. Many people are surprised by how playful I am because I also take on big, serious challenges. But life is meant to be lived audaciously - a life chosen, not one that is passively accepted. Let go of fear, take risks, and embrace the possibilities.

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight.” — Proverbs 3:5-6

4. Stay loving.

Negativity is easy. Social media makes it even easier—criticism and judgment often come before understanding. It takes strength to love people we disagree with and find ways to move forward productively. But that’s exactly what we should strive to do. The world has enough cynicism; be someone who leads with love.

“Be on your guard; stand firm in the faith; be courageous; be strong. Do everything in love.” — 1 Corinthians 16:13-14

5. Create your luck.

If you ever feel stuck, start talking to more people and putting yourself in more rooms. I tell young people looking for direction: talk to people. The more conversations you have, the more events you attend, the more opportunities you’ll find, and the more goals you’ll achieve. Luck, in this sense, compounds over time. The more you put yourself out there, the more doors will open.

“For whoever has will be given more, and they will have an abundance. Whoever does not have, even what they have will be taken from them.” — Matthew 25:29-30

I don’t have it all figured out, and I don’t think I ever will—but that’s the beauty of it. These reflections might change over time, and that’s okay. What matters is taking the time to think about what guides you, what you value, and what lessons resonate with you in this season of life.